I wake up and I swear I just slept on a cloud. The bed is so big, I get lost in it. I am surrounded by down and linen. My feet stick out from under the fluffiness and I can instantly tell that the room is a cool 65. I grab my tiny bell and I ring it twice. My butler, who looks like he just stepped off abercrombie page 2, brings me a chilled red bull and informs me that my bath is ready. Before my feet can touch the floor, he has my body wrapped in silk and my feet covered in plush. Upon entering the bathroom I think for a moment, am I in Rome. Before me is the biggest bath I have ever seen, chilled champagne and 3 topless Women with pink sponges. This is how they did it in the day, I loose the silk and plop down in a sea of bubbles. My hair is washed, my body scrubbed, I don't know if I will ever get out. ANT, ANT, ANT, ANT, ANT, ANT....Fucking Alarm! Seriously pisses me off! can you just once, let me finish my freaking dream.! Apparently that is just too much to ask.
These days I prefer dream land. This weekend alone I have had orgasms with Matthew Mc Hotty, won the lottery and been to quite a few casinos. That is the life.
Side Note: No, that isn't my real bathroom.
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