7.10.2009

So, two girls walk in a bar....



young, cute, fun, amazing, beautiful, smart, awesome, well you get the picture. We go to the bar order a drink and start to talk about god. I don't know why I am giggling right now as I write this but I just find that funny as shit, and its the truth. Anyhow across the way is stalky, stalkerten. You know the guy that is at the bar hugging it already when you walk in. Freakboy starts asking me questions and trust me I am being VERY nice! I answer them and smile or I should say I answer them and SUCK down my jim and coke. After awhile I am seriously over saying what, what, what did you say. Hey fatboy why don't you come over here so I can hear wtf you are saying. Okay, no I didn't say fatboy and yes i am a fatgirl so I will say fatboy whenever the hell I want. I am already irritated when he comes over because apparently not only is he a fat, freakboy, stalker he is also deaf and he cant retain information! ughh! He comes over and tells us that he had been there since 4! Ding, Ding, Ding, that explains it all bud. The next question that came out of his mouth will be with me forever. " So were you guys alive when Elvis died?" WTF, WtF, WTH, seriously. Alive when Elvis died?!? The point is, this guy is out there! That was definitely a first.

So, two girls are still sitting at the bar. And for the record, this is the best part. behind the bar a new bartender is being trained. Already I am particularly not impressed. Partly because I am bitch and partly because I like my usual bartenders. Behind us walks up Mr. nice guy when he is sober, fun guy when he is buzzed and an obscene monster when he is drunk. At the moment he is fun buzzed guy. He then says to me a line that cracked me up. I felt like for one second I was living in a man's brain, and I LIKED it!! He says: "Damn the new girl is already dressing like it's rent week." I laughed my ass off. I had never heard that before but he assured me it was all too true. So tacky yet so great.  Anywho that's all folks!

10 comments:

RPM said...

Jim is good, but you should step up to Maker's Mark because you're worth it.

And you never told me where you were when Elvis died...

Heff said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Heff said...

RPM is right. Maker's Mark is THE SHIT. I know this because I'm an official Maker's Mark Ambassador. -

No need to kneel....



Try me, I'm Oh, SO GOOD !

Brittany said...

LMFAO! I'd drink more if someone asked me that. And that line from the guy was hysterical. I like it a lot.

Aunt Juicebox said...

So, where you? Alive when Elvis died? LOL I'm pretty sure I was but only just. I remember when my daughter was about 7 or 8 and we were listening to an Elvis cd, and she asked me if we could go to his concert.

Funnyrunner said...

I don't get it...

Magic City College Girl said...

lol what a night. amazing the things that people do or say because of some alcohol.

Danielle-lee said...

Sometimes I love fucking with guys like him. I would have said yes when he asked if i was alive when elvis died. Other times, it just annoys me and i don't wanna be nice anymore!

Wil said...

That is a great line, I'll have to use that sometime.

Wil Harrison.com

just a girl... said...

it is a great line and it cracks me up. I have so many more where this came from and that is just sad, sad, sad!