At times I get that rocking chair in an attic window feeling, and I don't like it. This afternoon I got that no so fresh feeling and it got me thinking. When did lizards start walking ON grass? I know I have divulged that I'm old, and due to my gray hair last I am now a cougar. But I am not so old that I don't remember, that lizards walk in grass not on grass.
Today I witnessed a lizard walking on grass, and to say it was weird is not giving weird justice. That mini-iguana was walking, skipping, running whatever you want to call it on top of the grass. I don't know what it is, but my backyard has become there brothel. They are everywhere! I think the only one in my house that is happy about that is my cat. For breakfast he has lizard head, lunch lizard head, dinner well you get the picture. So I get to see live lizards on acid during the day, headless lizards all over my house, and at night those bastards turn straight up albino.
I am not a lizard hater nor am I member of PETA. However, I do prefer them to be at least 10 feet from me at all times and I will not remove a live lizard from my cat's mouth. In the instance just mentioned, the cat is the real killer here not me. Anyways my damn point is that when I went to find my lizard pic, I found a lizard watch band. I have decided to start a new organization and its called SKTFL. It stands for Stop Killing The Fucking Lizards. What sick person is out there catching lizards for watch bands. I will tell you who, its the "skin wearers" and "people eaters".
All donations requests can be made to firstname.lastname@example.org . Thanks and have a great day.